Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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