Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
