Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Watching her eat just hurts me
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize