kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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