Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize