I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
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