Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
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