his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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