just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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