i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
