We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
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