Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
