Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
