WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
