My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
