So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
