Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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