oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize
