I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize