Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
