living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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