5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
