We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
a search helicopter?!
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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