we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Randomize
