i permit you to call me
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
well you can't waste a boner
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
