My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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