All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I have so many feelings about this burrito
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
