Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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