I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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