Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
