Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
