I am full of burrito and curiosity
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
