So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Randomize