I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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