these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
