halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
you made out with another girl for some wings
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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