why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Randomize
