If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I just pynch a tree in the face
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I cannot find my penis.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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