My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Randomize
