I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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