There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
