I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Randomize
