my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
