Moan for me like Helen Keller
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Randomize
