people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
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