I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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