i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Randomize