I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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