what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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