you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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