Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
