I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize